The time has come for a write up of the original tOj. The One Jeep.. to rule them all. As everyone knows, one must always name a vehicle, I chose tOj. And I’ve had to explain why she is the one jeep, and I shall now do that for clarification.
When I spoke of buying a jeep, I was encouraged by multiple people, and finally made to decide that yes, this is a right move. So rai and i searched out and found 2 jeeps to look at.. one I was particularly interested in. So we went. And it looked great in the pictures.. not so much in real life. Too bad. AND on top of that.. they wouldn’t let me test drive it. So fuck those guys.
Then we went to the next jeep. Which had sold two days prior. So it was on to breakfast. Village Inn, where we sat and looked on our collective media devices to find the next one to go see. A few phone calls later and suddenly, it was looking like this.. this was not a great idea. Then, i decided to go to a place 
called McCloskey Motors here in town, and we saw what was to become.. my.. destiny.
Let me say, this is not my first jeep. My love affair started at the ripe age of.. oh 13? My father asked me as i was approaching the age of a drivers license, what kind of car I would like to have when i turned the ripe old age of 16. I had already known. i said: “An old jeep!” and being the resourceful bastard my father is, he found that jeep, and she was a 1955 CJ5. That jeep, I named Pamela. Because lets face it.. I was 14 at this point, and Pamela Anderson was one of the hottest items on the market. But has she stopped being that? Besides the point. I learned many things with that jeep. That mud rules, snow is not bad either and that jeeps require many tears in order to complete anything on them. Blood. Sweat. Tears. The three main ingrediants of Jeeping/ Jeep ownership. I replaced many things on that jeep, a generator was swapped to alternator, a starter, a water pump, a clutch, much oil. I skinned the paint off and repainted her. I loved that jeep. She met her untimely demise in a Tbone car accident. During the down times of much working on her, I was driving a 1979 CJ5. Chevy 350 under the hood. HOOWAH!
After a 10 year break from Jeeping, I was back. I test drove tOj, and I loved her. I was impressed with how she drove, and how quiet jeeps had become in the time that i was away from them. I had to have her. They had to sell her. It was a match made in heaven. They sent me home with her. I was to have an “extended test drive” while they got th
e financing straight. I took it back the day I was supposed to, they say to me “We don’t ahve it yet, but we will, I promise.. just give me more time” I say “Thats fine, I’m just supposed to have her back today.” They retort: “Fuck that, keep her. Don’t call us, we’ll call you.” Meanwhile, i found certain quirks about her. She had “Death Wobble” – It wasn’t fun. Hit about 50, hit a bump, and she shook like crazy until I slowed to 20.
After a solid 3 weeks of TRYING to get the financing, they finally got it. Holy cow, I have a jeep. Then the maintinence they ag
reed upon, like fixing the death wobble and making the check engine light turn off. So out of the girl for a week, and then it was back on like donkey kong! Here’s the specs. Shes a 2004 Wrangler SE 2.5 litre 4 cylinder engine., Thats right, who needs the 4.0? The interstate does, thats where she really struggles, but in the mud, shes a dream. She was bone stock, with 42k miles. But she needed some love.
It was summer, the full top had to go. So I ripped her top off. After which, I was going to get the Bikini Top, but went with the Safari Top instead, courtesy of Smi
ttybilt. But, in true toj fashion, they gave me a top for the wrong year and then I had to ORDER one for the right year which took about a week. More One Jeep. Nothing’s easy. I also needed to complete the look I wanted by adding a deck cover. Who needs a back seat anyways?!
But the tires were getting bald, so I was on the warpath saving for new shoes.. BUT she needed to be taller first. Because i needed at least 32’s. So rather than spending the grand I didnt have on a suspension lift, I opted for the 2” body lift. Read up on it, looks good. Looks easy. Went to pick it up.. they had 
to order it. This time though, it was only an hour away, so rather than have them deliver, I went to pick it up at the warehouse in Denver. My good ol big brother went with me. Seeing as how the windows were down Safari was on.. we both managed to get stung by the SAME WASP on the way there. That should’ve been an indication that we shouldn’t try anything more that day. But seeing as how we are hard headed, were we gonna stop? HELL NO! And we started the lift and it took.. some 13 hrs. Pain. In. The. Ass. Nothing’s easy with this Jeep, that is why she is the ONE jeep to rule them all.
So
I’m saving for wheels and tires. I only got tires.. I was saved up for the tires I wanted.. but not anymore. Driving one day.. pop goes a tire! NEW TIRES THE NEXT DAY! But no new wheels, and I still have that shitty ass Cooper on the spare. New tires are 32” BFK AT/KO ‘s. Ahh well. I of course, bought a badass shifter knob. Which was promply stolen. So I bought another, identical to it. I call him Super Creepy Steve. This one is vers
ion 2.0.
All in all, shes a new jeep, and hasn’t taken very much maintinence to keep rolling down the road. I’ve even found adverse weather conditions cannot stop the tOj. Due to the slow money and lack of access to trails in the winter, I di
d only one more mod to her, and that was the addition of fog lights. They too were a pain in the ass, for I could not get one to ground properly, Again, this jeep is much like my old CJ’s, and yet still through the blood sweat and tears, shes my love .
So there you have it, the final write up of the introductions of the the One Jeep family.
Oh and one more thing I should add.. Despite loving how a white jeep looks, she is patriot blue.
The End. As rai said: See you in hills.
